In a world where vulnerability often feels like a burden, many Christians grapple with conflicting emotions during times of suffering. Weāve all witnessed it: a friend brushing away tears while insisting, āItāll be fine,ā or a loved one wrestling with guilt over feelings of despair. This complex dance between faith and emotion can leave us feeling isolated, as if we must hide our true selves behind a mask of unwavering optimism.
Yet, as followers of Christ, weāre invited to a different narrativeāone where itās not only acceptable to feel pain but essential to bring our raw emotions to God without excuses or explanations.
The Need for Honest Vulnerability
In conversations about faith, I’ve noticed a recurring theme: many believers feel compelled to qualify their feelings. Phrases like āI shouldnāt feel angryā or āI know itāll be fineā often slip into their expressions of vulnerability. I remember one friend who, after sharing troubling news, fought back tears and forced a smile, insisting everything would turn out alright. Another dear saint expressed her turmoil after losing a loved one, admitting, āI feel guilty because I’m constantly going back and forth between despair and trust.ā
When Jesus says, āCome to me all ye who are weary and heavy ladenā (Matt. 11:28), Jesus does not lay out stipulations necessary before bringing our burdens to Him.
And when God tells us to cast our anxieties on Him (1 Peter 5:7), the idea is that we forcefully throw onto Jesus what brings angst into our life. This requires vulnerability before God! He is strong enough to carry our weightiest burdens, sturdy enough to catch our most forceful and angry throw, and He does not need a well-thought-out explanation of our pain to love us beyond understanding.
The Bible tells us how God works in and through suffering, but many have falsified these truths by adding to them or subtracting from them. Watch out for the false narratives that set wrong expectations for believers amid distress, and instead embrace the profound truths from Scripture that provide for us hope in seasons of suffering.
What Suffering as a Christian Does Not Mean: Debunking the False NarrativesĀ
1. We will always feel happy
One of the most damaging misconceptions is that the Lord promises a life of ease when we follow Him. Nowhere in Scripture does God promise that His followers will feel happy all the time. Ā
What He does promise is joyāa deep-seated contentment in Christ and His provisions, even in pain (James 1). Joy can mean the same thing as happiness, but in the presence of suffering, it is quite different. Jesus himself wept over the loss of Lazarus, His tears dignifying the grief of those around Him. Believer in Jesus, you donāt need to plaster on a smile in your pain to be loved or accepted by God.Ā
2. We will never question Godās plan
Many believe that true faith means never questioning Godās plan. Yet the Psalms are filled with heartfelt inquiries about Godās ways, echoing our own struggles. In Psalm 13 David begins with, āHow long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever?ā And Job, who faced numerous afflictions, says to God, āWhy have you made me your mark? Why have I become a burden to you? (7:20).Ā
These men brought their questions to God because they trusted in His steadfast love. Child of God, you are invited to bring your honest questions and doubts; God already knows them. True vulnerability stems from trust in the one who created us and holds us in His hands.
3. Things will work out the way we hope
Another false teaching suggests that if we pray earnestly, our hopes will materialize. This causes Christians to believe they have weak faith if a disease is not healed, or if a child longed for is not given.
Faith, friends, does not control God.
Godās plans transcend our understanding, and sometimes the hardships we endure are integral to His greater purpose (Isaiah 55:8); in fact, sometimes our hardships are Godās answer to our prayer.
What Suffering as a Christian Does Mean: Affirming Scriptural Truths
1. The assurance of Godās Presence
As believers, we have the amazing promise that we are never alone in our suffering. Jesus was forsaken on the cross so that we would never be. In Christ, God is always with us, and not even death will separate you from Jesusā great love: āEven though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with meā (Psalm 23:4).Ā
God does not love suffering; He loves you. And that love is so intense that in the suffering his love is tangibly experienced through a meal from a friend, a hug from sister in Christ, or a note from a loved one. These are glimpses of God’s presence in our pain.
2. The Gift of Community
The church is a beautiful gift, urging us to bear one anotherās burdens (Galatians 6:2). The relief felt when someone is willing to carry the weight of a trial with you is an incomparable blessing. When we share our struggles, we experience the radical love of Christ through one another. Donāt retreat from your church community when you feel overwhelmed; itās precisely during times of hardship that you need it the most.
3. The hope of God’s sovereignty
Nothing in life is random. Godās sovereignty ensures that every single detail in our journey serves a purpose (Colossians 1:16-17).
I prayed for three years for my dad to be healed from cancer. After my fatherās passing, I wrestled with pain and confusion. In Godās kindness, dadās death became a catalyst for my spiritual growth, reminding me of the immense love of my heavenly Father in the absence of my earthly one.
Years later, I discovered a prayer dad had written in his diary: if his death would deepen my relationship with Jesus, he was at peace to be taken home.
God is good all the time, and in sometimes in mysterious ways we cannot fully comprehend or imagine.Ā
Trust in these promises from God, and donāt fall prey to false narratives that hinder your faith in suffering. Lean into the truth that allows us to cry, to question, and to trust. With Godās strength, we take each day one step at a time, and when needed, we weep in the presence of Jesus who knows suffering, and we rest in the unwavering love of the One who promises to walk with us every step of the way.Ā
